Dont' mess up your life with idiot customers everyday... try to laugh.... live you life happily...
Misdirectory Assistance
Agent : What city and listings?
Caller : Sears in Chicago, please…
Agent : One moment for the Chicago Police…Please hold for the number, thank you.
Agent releases the Chicago Police Department number.
Avoid Saying “Ma’am”
Agent : What city and listings?
Caller : Dover, Delaware. I need the Dog Pound.
Agent : One moment…Is it Dover, ma’am?
Caller : Huh? I don’t know if it’s a doberman. It’s just a big black dog that’s ruining my lawn! (laughs)
Disgrace Anatomy
Bad-Accent Agent : Thank you for calling ____! My name is Joseph. May I have your customer ID, please?
Irate Caller : Give me somebody who can speak English.
Bad-Accent Agent : I’m speaking in English, ma’am.
Irate Caller : Well, I don’t understand you! Where are you from?
Bad-Accent Agent : I’m located in a call center in the Philippines…
Irate Caller : Philippines? Where the f*** is that?
Bad-Accent Agent : It’s far from Uranus…
(Don’t event try that!)
Line To Heaven
Very Irate Caller : I’ve been through this long enough! I’ve been transferred ten times, I’ve been put on hold ten times. This is my third time to call. Just give me your supervisor!
Soft-Spoken Agent : The supervisor is not availabl at the moment, but I’ll see what we can do…
Very Irate Caler : No! There’s nothing you can do! Just give me anyone higher. Your manager, your president, or God. I don’t care.
Soft-spoken agent: Sir, the manager and the president are not available at the moment. But the good news is…God is just a prayer away.
Ignorant Inside
Technical Support: Now look at the front side panel of your computer and tell me what you see.
Non-Techie Customer: I have, you know, the trays for CD’s and the diskette drive and some buttons and lights.
Technical Support: Great! Look at the drive. Is there a square thing inside? Is there a diskette inside?
Non-Techie Customer: No, but there’s a square thing with Intel Inside.
